A body to diet for[author-post-rating] (2/5 Stars)

Imagine for a moment if Les Misérables had violently let itself go. The revolutionaries became too fat to riot, the army too tired and hungry to shoot them. You either die a classic or you live long enough to become A Body to Die(t) For.

This is the story of Greta, a teenage girl and her wildly fluctuating weight as she is hounded by paparazzi, politicians and an honest-to-God body conscious terrorist group.

Living off a diet of “celery, cigarettes and coke”, Greta is clearly the voice of our befuddled generation. Spouting such inspirational remarks as, “I believe in my good friend Tony, you can’t have value without being bony”. Set that to The Internationale music and we’ll have a Kentucky fried revolution on our hands in no time.

TKD Productions presents a performance where it’s entirely possible to be watching well into the second half and still have absolutely no idea who any of the characters onstage are. Each time an actor enters you spend several mystified minutes trying to recall if you’ve even seen them before. But then they’re gone, prancing off-stage presumably on their way to blow up another Weight Watchers’ meeting. This bizarre musical could have a cast of thousands and we’d never know.

As your focus meanders listlessly around the stage, uncertain of which florid nameless maniac you should be keeping an eye on, it might spot the character’s cardboard props. Cut-out chicken legs, burgers and cats are resplendent throughout the production. Which begs the question: why aren’t these people allowed props?!

With lyrics only mildly preferable to cranial intrusion this bewildering and offensive musical will leave you elated. Unintentionally hilarious beyond measure.

A Body to Die(t) For played at C as part of the Edinburgh Fringe Festival. For more information and tickets, please see to the Edinburgh Fringe Website.